When the Aish goes out.

(Courtesy of http://randsco.com/)

I'll never forget the moment I knew without question that my life was controlled not by chance, or luck, or by the traffic on the freeway, but in fact by HaKodesh Baruch Hu. I know most people haave amazing stories of returning to Judaism, but mine began with an 80mph impact into a wall on Shabbos leaving me without one scratch or even a sore muscle. The only greater miracle in my mind at that point was the Yam Sof itself. When i first heard the term "Burning Out", it made sense for frum since birther's since most of the time they are forced into the daily routine without much understanding or connection to Hashem. I don't understand how a Baal Teshuva, a "Master of Return" could burn out. You just experienced the moment that made you realize that up to this point you had been living a lie and were ready to submit to G-d and repent and mend your ways. How could you go back? How could you then go on and deny G-d again? There is a question "When does a Baal Teshuva because Frum?" The real question is when does a searching soul really because a Baal Teshuva. This name is something sacred reserved for people that sacrifice everything for the sake of G-d! When you started keeping shabbos for a month, you aren't a Baal Teshuva, or when you keep kosher for six months. So the question at hand isn't really how do Baal Teshuvas burn out, its why do these souls begin a journey and end it so quickly. It revolves around becoming an observant Jew for the wrong reasons. Becoming religious for a significant other is the worst. When you see people end a relationship and girl is back to dressing not tznius out at clubs trying to meet guys. The guys are at that same club with their yarmulkes off trying to meet non religious girls. Its a hard thing to attempt but a lot of this wouldn't happen if religious people learned to be Shomer Negiah. Easier said than done, its something I have struggled with on my journey. I don't think I'm holy or on some other level that I have a right to cast judgment upon fellow Yidden I just think its sad that someone would work so hard and believe me it is VERY hard to be religious just to give it up once a significant other isn't in their life. Putting a person above G-d is the worse thing you can do. I really pray for all those yidden off the derech to come back please. Hashem needs your prayers and your love.


* Note: These posts are not meant to inflate my Ego and show how religious I am. My hope is that people will read this and provide answers to questions that I myself cannot answer.